Guess what? Everyone has gas problems once in awhile. And sometimes when we have gas problems, we need to get OTC meds to help make that gas issue go away. In situations like this, I wish there was a more dignified way to purchase these items at the grocery store, without everyone knowing my business.
This also extends to buying "lady items" at CVS. Not everyone needs to know when I'm on my cycle, thanks.
So, lately I haven't been feeling so well and I cannot get into my doctor so I have been using WebMD to self-diagnose myself and hopefully rule out what is wrong with me. In the process of ruling things out, it lead me to Jewel this weekend for groceries and to pick up some generic Gas-X pills. No, I don't have stinky gas, I'm just having some digestive issues. People who sit around me at work don't have to be scared.
Anyhow, I successfully hid the gas pills under my groceries so I wasn't advertising my issue to everyone in the store...until I had to pay. A cute guy was standing behind me, giving me a nice smile, when suddenly my Cheerios tipped over and the pills were exposed. I hid them again, thinking I was safe, until the cashier said out loud, holding the pills...
"Ma'am, are these gas pills yours?"
Dying of embarrassment, trying to keep my face from turning red, I said back...
"Yes, yes they are"
The cute guy actually took a step away from me and if I had any sense or control over myself, I would have let one rip, given him a wink and walked out because even (non)gassy girls need love too. But I cowered in shame, paying quickly and running out in the cold, gas pills and all.
Thankfully, I am feeling better. Stomach -1, self-esteem - 0. Maybe next time.
This also extends to buying "lady items" at CVS. Not everyone needs to know when I'm on my cycle, thanks.
So, lately I haven't been feeling so well and I cannot get into my doctor so I have been using WebMD to self-diagnose myself and hopefully rule out what is wrong with me. In the process of ruling things out, it lead me to Jewel this weekend for groceries and to pick up some generic Gas-X pills. No, I don't have stinky gas, I'm just having some digestive issues. People who sit around me at work don't have to be scared.
Anyhow, I successfully hid the gas pills under my groceries so I wasn't advertising my issue to everyone in the store...until I had to pay. A cute guy was standing behind me, giving me a nice smile, when suddenly my Cheerios tipped over and the pills were exposed. I hid them again, thinking I was safe, until the cashier said out loud, holding the pills...
"Ma'am, are these gas pills yours?"
Dying of embarrassment, trying to keep my face from turning red, I said back...
"Yes, yes they are"
The cute guy actually took a step away from me and if I had any sense or control over myself, I would have let one rip, given him a wink and walked out because even (non)gassy girls need love too. But I cowered in shame, paying quickly and running out in the cold, gas pills and all.
Thankfully, I am feeling better. Stomach -1, self-esteem - 0. Maybe next time.
Um, I won't make any of you share anything bad, but let me know if you've had an embarrassing shopping experience, for meds, "lady items" or anything else.
Time to go hide from embarrassment.
I'm sorry...I'm giggling uncontrollably because, well, apparently I'm an 8 year old boy! I just think gas stories are funny.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I totally bought a pregnancy test at Walgreens and the little old checkout lady asked what grade I was in.
Oh my goshhhh I would have died and run out of there just like you did. I hate buying embarrassing stuff like that.
ReplyDeleteI am laughing right now too and I like Erin think gas stories are funny. When ever I have a habit of running in for personal things like lady things or meds like that and just running back out -- the grocery store I go to has a self checkout, I use that and keep it in the basket, then scan and bag as quickly as possible!
ReplyDeleteI cringed throughout this entire post because I could just tell that this post title would lead to nowhere good. I don't have a specific story, but I've actually gone to the other side of town to buy stuff, just so the people on my side of town don't any of my business. The people around here are nosey! You can't purchase a frozen pizza without a remark about it, let alone lady things.
ReplyDeleteDid you know that pregnancy tests are RIGHT next to the yeast infection boxes? So as I stand there trying to decide on what test to buy people walk past me thinking I'm ready to make a disgusting loaf of bread. I try to make it better by saying, really loudly;
ReplyDelete"Wowie I sure am pregnant! Man that sperm found my egg!"
I dont' have any embarassing stories like that, but for some reason EVERY SINGLE TIME i go buy "lady products", the guy at the register happens to be cute.
ReplyDeleteOh no!! lol What an ass for saying that outloud. As if he didn't have more discretion. Sheesh.
ReplyDeleteThey don't make clerks like they used to.
Aww you're sooo cute even when you talk about your gas problem!!! It's not fair :) This put a huge smile on my face:)
ReplyDeleteI really do not have cute/embarassing story like yours, but I always get kind of shy when I have to buy girlie products because I don't want to deal with cute male casher. Therefore, I usually sent my Hubby to buy my stuff for me and he goes and get them for me:)
Oh no!!! I hate that!
ReplyDeleteI once went to Target to buy lady products and they were on ridiculous sale, so I decided to stock up. The guy at the register said "hmmm, you really need that much? Must be heavy..." I wanted to explain but I decided it was pointless. Cashiers should get training on what items they shouldn't comment on.
Oh yeah, my favorite was when I had to pick up all my "lady items" and I ran into a guy from one of my classes. It's actually pretty funny trying to watch a guy stammer out a normal conversation while clearly checking out whether I'm buying light or heavy.
ReplyDeleteOr, you know, when I run to the 7eleven down the block in the middle of the night for some ice cream - a girl's got cravings, obviously- and the checkout lady asked if I had the munchies. Yeah.
I always feel when I am buying my "lady items" I have to be extra nice to the cashiers. I don't want then to see my purchase and think "crazy pms girl"
ReplyDeleteOk, that's bad and I'm sorry. But I'm not going to even tell you the horrible ordeal that happened to me today. Let's just say, at work+stomach ache+no plunger=mortification.
ReplyDeleteJust writing that made me cringe.
I am comforted by the fact that I cannot think of any embarrassing shopping instances.
ReplyDeleteLuck?
Or
Have I no shame?
Ignorance is bliss!
I just don't find those kinds of things embarassing and having worked in stores when i was a teenager you should be comfotrted in the knowledge that the store clerks don't remember what they're putting through the tills from one person to the next.
ReplyDeleteAll women have to buy sanitary products, and if cute boys can't handle it then they are going to have many problems when they get in relationships
Fight the fear ladies x
Everytime I go to buy "lady products" I keep looking over my shoulder to check if anyone is peering into my shopping basket.
ReplyDeleteAnother thing that bothers me immensely is the thought that people want to see exactly what variant I am buying... makes me a nervous wreck!
Ahahaha!
ReplyDeleteOk seriously......ahahahahaha!
I intentionally make sure I go through a line with a woman cashier when buying "feminine products" I suppose because I think they know whats what and I don't need to be embarrassed by it then?
ReplyDeleteJust think of it this way, if that guy had asked for your number after the whole gas pill debacle he might have been worth your time, clearly, cute or not, he wasn't worth your attention or your embarrassment.
but most importantly - did the pills work?
ReplyDeleteI honestly don't get embarrassed about my lady items, as you put it. I figure "hi, yes. You've noticed I'm a lady, maybe you're even attracted to me because I'm a lady. Which means that yes, I need lady items."
ReplyDeleteWith things like gas pills, well that's why God invented the self checkouts. That's all I'm saying.
Dude, I totally get my OTC stuff at CVS and then make a female pharmaceutical counter person take care of my order.
ReplyDeleteHeh.
I don't mean to laugh at your pain, but I really do think you should ahve let one rip!!! That would have totally been hilarious.
ReplyDeleteugh I hate going to buy lady items. sometimes i feel like i need to buy a ton of other stuff so it can go unnoticed or thankfully some places have self checkout. but if i do have to go thru a cashier, (this is bad) but I try to pick the non attractive older types who won't care what i'm buying.
ReplyDeleteHahaha I actually laughed out loud (and I'm in class..).
ReplyDeleteI always end up buying Advil and chocolate the day I need to buy tampons, which makes me feel like I'm holding a "PMS kit" sign at the store :P
oh man, i'm dying for you! i can't believe that sales person said that!
ReplyDeleteHaha oh goodness! That sounds mortifying.
ReplyDeleteIn high school, I had to buy a pregnancy test for my little sister's friend. I live in RURAL Iowa and so most everyone knows everyone. I knew it was risky to buy it - but we didn't know what else to do.
Yeah, as I was about to check out, my female pastor stepped in line behind me and we had to carry on this long conversation while 'my' pregnant test was sitting RIGHT there. We had a long talk about 'abstinence' at Sunday School the next week.
Its for situations like these that God invented self-check out machines :)
ReplyDeletetoo funny! If the cashier asked me that I would died too. That or said "Yeah...and I am about to pull the ripcord, if you know what I mean!"
ReplyDeleteI can't believe the cashier at Jewel said that! Wait, unfortunately, yes I can.
ReplyDeleteWhoa. i would have been ticked. Like they don't have gas too.
ReplyDeleteWow, that is terribly embarrassing. But why did he ask? I mean, how rude.
ReplyDeletethis must be how people who work in stores get their kicks. i don't remember doing this when i worked in a shop, that being said, i worked in a toy department of john lewis department store so i wasn't exactly selling anything embarrassing things.
ReplyDeletestill i think it's the height of unprofessionalism.
and kudos to you for coming out and admitting your problem on here. :)
That's almost straight out of a sitcom.
ReplyDeleteYep, I have the same problem buying this stuff, especially if it's the only thing I need. I always buy a ton of stuff to take attention away from the gas drugs/lady items/condoms/pregnancy test that I really am there for.
One time I was sick (the runs) but really needed to get some shopping done so being the dope that I am, I went to the grocery store for a quick pick up of a few items. Needless to say, I didn't make it in time to the store's bathroom. I was mortified and left me cart in the aisle and hobbled back to my car. It was perhaps one of the most embarrassing moments of my life, although I don't think anyone even noticed it...
ReplyDeleteOh man, what a crappy cashier! Sorry for your embarrassment, but your story made me laugh.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh, that is awful but so, so funny!
ReplyDeleteOnce I was like 10 days late, and my boyfriend wanted me to take a pregnancy test, so I went to CVS to buy one. First, I saw that my best friend's older brother was the Pharmacist that day and the tests were in an aisle with all the condoms and stuff, right by the pharmacy window. I quickly picked one up and took it to the cashier and when the lady rang me up she said, "Good luck!" Seriously? I was like 19 years old!Just put the damn thing in the bag and let me get out of there!
When I was in high school, a guy friend reached into the front pocket of my backpack and pulled out an OB tampon. "What's this?" he asked. I gave him my look of death and said, "It's a tampon." He threw it back into my bag with a horror-stricken look on his face. I think he was more embarrassed than I was.
ReplyDeleteAww, sorry.
ReplyDeleteLOL! I am appauled that he would *actually* ask you that!
ReplyDeleteoh how lame that she asked you if they were yours. haha. but at least you can laugh about it now right? and i'm always afraid i'll run into someone i know on the rare occasions that i buy condoms, seriously freaks me out, don't ask me why.
ReplyDeletei always end up with the hotty cashier while i'm on the monthlies. and he's the only one available.
ReplyDeleteAw funny story.
ReplyDeleteI get so embarrassed about buying certain things, too. I always hide them under the rest of my groceries, and then try to casually slip them on the conveyor belt as if it was just an afterthought to get them.
Haha! I haven't had any embarassing stories like this but now that I typed it out I'm sure I'll have one tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteAlthough when I was in high school I went with my best friend to buy condoms (her first time, not mine, and I don't understand to this day why she didn't just send her boyfriend) and MY bf's dad was behind us in line. I don't think he even noticed us, but we giggled a lot anyway.
Awwww! :(
ReplyDeleteI used to work in a grocery store, so I have plenty of them! Hmmmmm...there was a time and the checker was really hot, and he only said hi to me, and I said good instead of saying hi, or hello. I guess I must have thought he made conversation, when all he said was hi.
Try buying a pregnancy test and a pack of condoms at the same time. That raised some eyebrows.
ReplyDeleteI have no shame, so I couldn't even be embarrassed.
I'm fairly positive that I would have died. But I was also that girl who was too embarassed to buy condoms at Walmart, so my BFF grabbed them and tossed them in her cart. *shrugs*
ReplyDeleteI'm glad your digestive issues are better now.
Oh that is EMBARRASSING!
ReplyDelete