Sunday, May 11, 2008

My first trip to the local strip club

You heard me, Saturday night I lost my strip club virginity. I was back in Wisconsin for a bachelorette party and we visited the Airport Lounge's male revue - rockin' the airport from 9:30 p.m. to midnight every Saturday.

Unfortunately, because of my cringe-inducing Thursday-night events, I was not drinking (but did have two sips of a shot before my stomach started kicking me around again) so I have a very clear memory of the night's events. And at the end of the night, my friends KMo and Sarah were also right, I had to wash every single article of clothing immediately.  My hair still smells like strip club too.

We were treated to four dancers at the strip club, Giovanni, Hot Joe, some unnamed guy in a peach G-string and Andy-something (I wasn't listening to closely apparently to his name) and the dancers definitely got better as the night went on. The bachelorette party I was with voted "Hot Joe" as the best of the bunch and of course, with half of the group intoxicated and with pocket-fuls of $1 bills, there were many random, yet humorous quotes that came from the night. The other four bachelorette parties that were in the crowd helped contribute to this list too.

I've listed a few below for you all to enjoy. I'll let you imagine the context for each:
  • "Oh my"
  • "I don't want to burn you"
  • "That's not sanitary"
  • "Bring out the bucket"
  • "OMG there's a tassel"
  • "He's limber"
In addition to taking pictures and stuffing $1 bills down the bride's shirt for the strippers to remove, someone managed to stuff a $1 bill in my shirt, which I could not remove before the stripper in the peach G-string and pierced nipples, came over and helped me donate a few more dollars to his "bucket" for the night. Yes, he was sweaty and sadly it was only mildly hot.

I can't really describe some of the images I saw last night, some made me definitely blush and say, "whoa look at that." I might have looked like a first-timer, but I could still holler, clap and wave bills like the rest of the ladies. At the end of the night, some ladies, who were definitely overserved, got up and started swinging on the poles themselves while the guys worked the crowd. I won't lie, I was very tempted to go up and do a swing-around myself, but after watching one girl lick part of the pole, I decided not to. Next time.

I don't know if I'll be attending the Airport Lounge again but I'm glad I can cross "go to a strip club" off my "to do" list. There is a rumor that someone took a picture of me donating to my stripper's "bucket" but I'll have to confirm before deciding if it should be posted.

Also, I'm fitted for my bridesmaid dress and I won't lie, I have never felt that thin in a dress or that kind of princess-y pretty in a while.

20 comments:

Stephanie said...

I've never been and don't plan on ever going. :P

My favorite was "That's not sanitary." That could go for so many things I'm sure. But you could put all of those quotes together and make one hilarious run on sentence!

shirleytemple said...

Whoa! My last event after twirling around the south pole involved a penquin strip club, two walruses strutting their stuff, a frozen pitcher of marguaritas ( and I do mean frozen" and a "squirrel" that was so attached to his nuts (where's the bucket)he must have been on steriods. Whoa what a night!!!!

~Angela~ said...

Oh, man. Sounds like an AWESOME time. The only strip show I ever saw was amateur night at a gay bar. I'll spare you the details and just say it wasn't pretty.

Kristen said...

I would say your experience was just like mine - First time and probablly the last. I never want my bachelorette party to entail male strippers but Im not going to lie they were hot.

Arielle said...

I've seen individual strippers (both male and female) but have never been to a strip club. I think it's the kind of place that would make me uncomfortable, I totally don't find that stuff hot. But I do sort of want to go once just to have the experience.

Blaez said...

i have never been to a male strip club my first strip club experiences was when me and the ex lived in VA we went to a 21st birthday bash for a friend of his at a female strip club (thrown by dude's awesome fiance)...it was absolutely fun as can be. i enjoyed having my dollar bills taken from me in the most funnest ways...i like strip clubs. i should go to a male one before my next trip to another girl one.

ANG* said...

post pics - post pics! :)

Angela said...

Hahaha, well at least you had a fun time! Maybe you'll go again?

Bayjb said...

Thanks everyone for the great comments.

I would probably consider going again to the strip club, although probably not in the too near future. Glad to hear others who have gone to a male strip club have had similar experiences.

For pictures, they're supposed to be coming in this week so I'll pre-screen and see if I can put one up for everyone. I'm likely laughing in all of them as I do that when I get uncomfortable!

Kayleigh said...

Oh my word! I've never been to one either, but we did have two make a house call once....and I blushed the entire time. And it's amazing at how strippers cross the line and things turn downright nasty.

But that's a story for another day.

I agree with the others- pictures!

megkathleen said...

I want to hear the story behind "I don't want to burn you"!

Jenn said...

I don't know how I feel about male strippers. Something just isn't right. Maybe it's the thong. The sweat? I don't know. Glad you had a fun time!

Tipp said...

Bahaha,

"that's not sanitary"

Most likely it probably was not.

Hahaha

barbetti said...

Weirdly enough, I've wanted to experience one. For educational purposes, of course....

Princess Pointful said...

She LICKED the pole?
I bet that is where the "unsanitary" comment came from.

lifeintheleftlane said...

Wow, that sounds like a crazy night! I've never been to a male strip club, but I've been to female ones. It's weird, I always end up there with my guy friends. That's always a crazy experience.

male dancers maryland said...

Been to strip club such as male and female and was able to meet guys and girls there and establish friendship.

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