Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Do I objectify guys? Absolutely, now take your shirt off

I don't know why I remember this, but a few years ago I was watching MTV News (actually maybe MTV News Brief - let's be clear) and Usher, when he was super famous, was talking about how women would objectify him at his concerts. Apparently when you're young and have a nice body and parade around on stage with little to no clothing on, women objectify you. How did they figure us out?

Anyhow, he commented to MTV that it's wrong for women objectify men because "they're people too," which made me almost spit out my soda in laughter. Yes, because women are not objectified ever...not in men's magazines like Maxim or online or even walking down the street! I'm sure when the centerfold was being photographed for Playboy, she was thinking, "boy I really hope the guys don't just look at my body and rack because I'm also going for my Ph.D. in chemistry. I'm a real person, unlike my boobs."

I proudly declare that I objectify men on a daily basis. And now that it's summer and the cute boys are out in force with blue dress shirts and dress pants (it's a young professional girls dream), I am all over smiling and dreaming in my head of them under my spell, or at least going around without a shirt on in my apartment. But while I do objectify men and salivate over some, I do actually look for possible dates based on personality. That is still key, but having guys for the "fantasy file" (come on, we all have them) is still fun too. My friend Ryan comments openly about women and their butts when we're out, I just keep my objectifying comments in my head, but trust me, I'm scanning the room.

Unfortunately when I actually hit on guys or objectify them, it starts by me giving them a smile and look which just consists of me widening my doe eyes and tilting my head down slightly. They love it. It's like, "yes I'm looking right at you and thinking impure things, want to come over and ask what?"

My friend Liz busted me giving some guy the look on the bus one night after a Banana Republic event. I didn't care if he was a genius or single, because in my head, he was a) attractive, b) interested in me and c) looking exceedingly hot. Nothing was going to happen, so my mind was having a fun time. Disclaimer: I do not condone cheating. I would never ever do it.

So look out guys, it's summer and you're officially on "objectifying notice." I can't help myself.  So put on the nicest dress shirt you have and compete for my imagination's attention. Meow.

5 comments:

Stephanie said...

So funny how you say "put on the nicest dress shirt you've got". The opposite of how a guy would objectify a woman (take off your nicest dress shirt).
It just shows that men and women do think differently.

Arielle said...

Stephanie has a good point, there! Also, I bet a lot of guys WANT to be objectified. I bet even Usher wants to be objectified, he just doesn't want to seem like a sleazeball.

Stacey said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
megkathleen said...

Flirting is the best - I don't think I will ever stop objectifying guys no matter how old and wrinkly I become.

d said...

i LOVE this post. well SAID.